The one thing that is common to our human existence, common to every individual, organization, family, team, community and culture –the one thing which, if absent will destroy most everything, destroy the most influential leader, destroy the greatest friendship, and destroy most relationships is TRUST. 

The economy of trust can be measured by the trust tax imposed by others when mistrust exists. The low trust tax is steep! Low trust creates withholding, caution; which leads to deliberate slowness, untruthfulness which equates to lack of commitment to others, an unwillingness to work for and on behalf of others, tension because no one cares about others or the mission of the system. Low trust work people begin to feel and think work is just a place to be not to commit. They say I do not like my job! Why should I care because they don’t care about me?  Now if that sounds like your team, organization, or a relationship let me offer you some suggestions that we have developed over the years working with people in our business practice coaching.  First know what you value which drives your behavior. These 6 values lead to others following you. These values are: 1. You demonstrate integrity-honesty, 2. You are competent in your chosen profession, 3. You inspire a vision/picture of a compelling noble desired future for all who chose to follow, 4. You are supportive to others, 5. You evoke transformation (as iron sharpens iron) in others, which enables others to act and 6. You care about those who choose to follow you. Demonstrate these values and you will gain followership.  You may call this the foundation of which to build your leadership point of view.

 Now that the foundation has been laid what are the bricks or behaviors that lay upon the foundation? What you do has far grater effect that what you say. If you want to develop mistrust in others be incongruent between your values and behaviors. Often one of the most challenging coaching questions is asked this way: what values do you deeply believe in that your are stepping on; what values are you not honoring?

So what are the behaviors we see in others that work?  What have we seen in our coaching? People learn into making and building a high trust account with others that they lead. 1. They practice true talk with others.  People know where they stand with the person.  I heard someone say this morning that to tell the truth is better than trying to remember what you said to others. 2. They behave in a way that shows people you genuinely care about others, 3. They demonstrate respect by fairness, caring, truthfulness, and concern for others aspirations. 4. They are transparent with others.   They Err on the side of over communication, which is better than a vacuum of nothingness. They are open and challenge others to call them out when they see that what you say is incongruent with what they do.  4. They apologize to others when wrong; - the first step and the second step would be to make the recovery impeccable in their promises. They demonstrate their truth.  5. They give credit to others and are loyal to those who follow them in their absence. They do what they say they will do.  6. They under promise but over delivery to others.  7. They practice what they preach and get better each day.  Continuous trust building is a matter of action. 8. When building trust, developing others to act - they state expectations plainly.  When you clarify expectations you create shared meaning with commitment up front.  9. Once expectations are agreed they practice accountability in themselves and holding others accountable for promises.  10. They take the always-listening role while leading. They listen to the words, the context and the dance. They connect at all of these levels with others in conversation. They learn to listen with their ears, eyes and heart.  Ancient native wisdom states that we were born with two ears and one tongue. You were created to listen so you have the always listen role.  11. They have a propensity to trust others. They learn how to extend trust to others based on the situation, the risk, the skill, will, and character of others. 12. Finally, they grow other people. This behavior has their highest priority as a leader.

 This is what we have seen in our coaching with others. We have been fortunate to take the personal journey with others, which has allowed us to formulate this road map for you.  6 values from the inside out and 12 actionable behaviors allow you build trust with others. Building trust with others is like staying out of jail on the monopoly board. It cost 200.00 dollars to get out of jail after three rolls of the dice.  In our real life; lost of money, time, and relationships is the trust tax we cannot afford as leaders in our families, teams, groups or organizations.